There are some announcements that can truly turn a family's daily life upside down, and the arrival of a baby is certainly one of them. This news is even more significant when there is already a child in the family—a child who, unlike the parents, might not have wished for the family to grow. To prepare for a new baby in the family and ensure everything goes as smoothly as possible, Élhée recommends giving your eldest some time and planning ahead. But that's not all.
CONTENTS:
- When to announce the arrival of a little brother or sister?
- Taking advantage of pregnancy to anticipate changes
- The day after birth: organizing the first meeting
- Encouraging the sibling bond
- A new baby in the family: a regression phase well known by pediatricians
- And what about jealousy? How do you handle it?
When to announce the arrival of a little brother or sister?
For children, time seems to pass much more slowly than it does for parents. There’s no point in announcing your pregnancy too early. Especially since you may prefer to wait until you’ve passed the 12-week milestone of pregnancy for reassurance. A good indicator? When your belly’s first real curves are truly visible, around 4 to 5 months.
In terms of how to share the news, choose a simple announcement, within the family, so your child feels included in what—even if they don’t realize it yet—is a big event. Use natural words and positive phrases to share the news, presenting it as something exciting and light to look forward to, like a party.
Smile, hug your child, and make the event as normal as possible to prevent them from seeing this birth as a revolution or something to fear.
If you have several children, it’s a bit different. The older ones have experienced this before, and it’s not unlikely that they’ll see your announcement coming from a mile away 😊. In this case, try to make a game out of it, like a big guessing game, and see who figures it out first.
Taking advantage of pregnancy to anticipate changes
As you know, the arrival of a baby is going to change many things. Free time, routine, independence... your first child will need to grow up a little faster. Their role in the family will change: from being an only child, they’ll become the oldest, the big brother or sister of the new baby. In a sibling group, the second-oldest loses their place and becomes the middle child. Whichever change it is, it’s rarely simple. So it’s especially important to use pregnancy as a time to anticipate questions and reactions.
These few months are the perfect opportunity to talk, explain, create a kind of birth bubble, and strengthen the bond between you and your child, as well as between your child and the baby to come. This new pregnancy gives you a chance to experience things differently and imagine a new kind of motherhood, alongside your child.
Involve them in a way they can handle. Suggest they talk to the baby through your belly, sing lullabies, or feel the baby’s kicks when they happen. Go pick out the future teddy together and let your child make the final decision. The most important thing is for your child to gently understand that their place is changing, but that your love remains constant. A baby is coming, but you’re still going to care for them with just as much attention, and together, you’ll get to do new, bigger-kid things.
The day after birth: organizing the first meeting
The big day will likely be a whirlwind. You won’t have time to look after your child, and your partner will be busy too. If possible, ask the grandparents for help, or if that’s not an option, friends your little one feels very comfortable with.
Beforehand, explain what’s going to happen (“when the baby is born, you’ll spend a day or two at Grandma and Grandpa’s, and then we’ll all come home together”). This way, your child will feel less stressed and unsettled.
Next, arrange the first meeting in a private, intimate setting, just with your partner and your children. In fact, if your eldest is already at home when you get back from the hospital or if you all come home together, they’ll feel even more proud to welcome their new brother or sister.
Élhée, shareable bottles meant to be passed on
A first meeting that might just be the moment for a first bottle? If your older child is old enough to understand, offer to let them share one of their Élhée bottles with the newborn, and why not, help you give it to the baby.
Soft, shatterproof (and therefore very safe), dishwasher and even microwave-safe, as well as durable and healthy thanks to high-quality materials like medical-grade silicone (guaranteed free from microplastic migration), Élhée BibRonds are highly resistant. So they’re perfect to be handed down from one sibling to another.
What’s more, the Élhée bottle isn’t just passable between siblings; it’s also an adaptable, evolving bottle. That’s right! Your eldest can use it as a little container for purees, while your newborn can use our newborn bottle with the (XS) “extra-slow flow” nipple or (S) “slow flow” nipple to drink their milk.
And to cover every situation, the BibRond also fits onto Avent and Medela breast pumps and bottle warmers, plus it can transform into a training cup thanks to the spill-proof silicone spout.
Encouraging the sibling bond
Just as parenthood is not innate, the bond between siblings is built, little by little. It’s especially the interactions between parents and between parents and children that create this special chemistry.
In a peaceful home, kindness and sibling relationships happen naturally. As much as possible, it’s up to you as parents to ensure the creation, nurturing, and maintenance of a gentle atmosphere, one encouraging exchanges, attachment, and the building of beautiful memories.
3 tips for preparing for a new baby if your eldest is under two years old
Even if your child is still very young and not talking much, they understand everything—especially when it comes from you. So you can talk to them about the baby on the way, just make sure you’re clear and practical.
-
Use simple and vivid language such as: “Mommy has a baby in her tummy” instead of “Mommy is pregnant.” As the pregnancy progresses, share tangible developments like the baby's first movements. Tell your child that the baby is moving, and if they want, let them place their hand on your belly to feel it.
-
Play with dolls with your child to help them “visualize” the baby. Holding, cuddling, feeding, giving kisses—all gestures they’ll soon get to do “for real” with their new brother or sister.
-
Make time for your child—for their questions, their needs, and their emotions. Imagine being the center of attention until now and suddenly being outshined by a baby they didn’t ask for. Even if, soon enough, they’ll love their sibling with all their heart, listening, love, and patience are always welcome.
3 tips for preparing for a new baby if your eldest is over two years old
With an older child, concerns and questions are likely to be more frequent. Resources like books and photos can help you prepare for the baby’s arrival in the best possible way.
-
Read and tell stories about family births and about being a big brother or sister. Knowing what’s coming is reassuring and helps even little ones imagine themselves in that role.
-
Reassure your children of your eternal love for them. Tell them your mother’s heart is infinitely big and your feelings are never divided but multiplied by all the happiness each child brings you.
-
Talk about their own birth—now’s the time! Show them pictures from the hospital and of their first days or months. This helps them see that they were, are, and always will be the family’s treasure, just like the baby arriving now.
In any case, no matter how old your eldest or eldest children are, take advantage of pregnancy and maternity leave to spend plenty of family time together. If you can, since you’ll inevitably be less present once the baby is born, use this time to hand over daily routines to your partner (getting dressed, brushing teeth, meals, bedtime stories… he can do it all, too, and it’s time for him to realize it 😉).
A new baby in the family: a regression phase well known by pediatricians
Ever since the baby was born, your eldest has started wetting the bed again, sucking their thumb, or refusing to fall asleep alone. This is especially common if your children are close in age and is totally normal. Pediatricians call this a regression phase.
Usually short-lived, this very common period happens because older siblings are trying to recapture all the attention for themselves. In reality, they just need to be sure their parents still love them as much as before.
The best approach—even if it isn’t always easy, especially since the postpartum period is naturally challenging for you too—is to downplay and let go of these small setbacks. And do not blame yourself; your firstborn just needs a little time to find their place and be sure that everything is okay, despite this huge family change.
And what about jealousy? How do you handle it?
Again, in a family—especially a new family—feelings of jealousy are normal. Because the baby takes up so much space, draws everyone’s attention, and especially because they take up a lot of your time, your older child might feel jealous and even a little angry towards the baby.
We know now that it’s pointless to ask a child to love another (“give the baby a kiss,” “look how sweet a baby is”). But respect is critical. No hitting, no biting, no pushing, and no ignoring one another. In time, the rule goes both ways. Similarly, each child has a right to their own space, their own toys, and their own moments with mom and dad. In this way, if there are any tensions, they should gradually ease.
And rest assured: before long, instead of just sharing their Élhée bottles, your children will be trading their best tricks—enough to quickly test your patience!
